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If you like funny blondes jokes, you are on right place. Endless collection of hilarious blonde jokes. Jokes are ordered by rating. Best blonde jokes are first. You can find here funniest blonde jokes on the world. Dumb blonde jokes for every day!

1.

A guy takes his blonde girlfriend to a football game for the first time.
After the game he asked his girlfriend how she liked the game.
Oh, I really liked it, she said, but I just couldn't understand though why they were beating each other up for 25 cents.
Suprised, the boyfriend asked, what do you mean?
The blonde girlfriend replied, all they kept screaming was: "Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back!"

49   
13joke rating: 3.77 (49/13)

2.

A Blonde walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. She says She is going to Europe on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan, so the Blonde hands over the keys to a new Rolls Royce parked in the street in front of the bank. Everything checks out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the Rolls into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Blonde returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41.
The loan officer says, "We are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multimillionaire.
What puzzles us is why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The Blonde replied, "Where else in New York can I park my car for two weeks for 15 bucks?"

39   
11joke rating: 3.55 (39/11)

3.

A blonde goes to a sales man to buy a TV, "I want that TV."
The man replies, "Sorry, I don't sell to blondes."
She went home, died her hair red and went back to the sales man, "I want this TV."
Again, "Sorry, I don't sell to blonbes."
Frustrated, she went home, shaved bold and went again, "I want this TV!!!"
Again, "Sorry I don't sell to blondes."
The blonde screams out, "HOW THE HELL DO U KNOW I'M BLONDE!?!"
He replies, "Cause that's not a TV, it's a microwave!"

37   
11joke rating: 3.36 (37/11)

4.

A blonde and a redhead met for dinner after work and were watching the 6 o'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge.
The blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump, and the redhead replied, "I'll take that bet!"
Anyway, sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead the $50 she owned.
The redhead said, "I can't take this, you're my friend."
The blonde said, "No. A bet's a bet."
So the redhead said, "Listen, I have to admit, I saw this one on the 5 o'clock news, so I can't take your money."
The blonde replied, "Well, so did I, but I never thought he'd jump again!"

20   
6joke rating: 3.33 (20/6)

5.

A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so on it goes.
The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette are you?"
She says, "No, I'm really a blonde."

"I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."

29   
9joke rating: 3.22 (29/9)

6.

Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe across the medicine cabinet?
A: So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.

62   
20joke rating: 3.1 (62/20)

7.

A young blonde woman was driving through the Florida Everglades while on vacation.
She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.
After becoming very frustrated with the attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the young Blonde declared, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator and get a pair of shoes for free!"
The shopkeeper said with a sly smile, "Well little lady, why don't you go on and give it a try?"
The blonde headed off to the swamp, determined to catch an alligator.
Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he spots the same young woman standing waist deep in the murky water, shotgun in hand.
As he brings his car to a stop, he sees a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her.
With lightning reflexes, the Blonde takes aim, shoots the creature and hauls it up onto the slippery bank.
Nearby were 7 more dead gators, all lying belly up.
The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement.
The blonde struggles mightily and manages to flip the gator onto its back.
Rolling her eyes heavenward, she screams in frustration,

"DAMN IT this one is barefoot too!!

17   
6joke rating: 2.83 (17/6)

8.

What did the blonde say when she found she is pregnant?

"Is it mine?"

33   
12joke rating: 2.75 (33/12)

9.

A guy walks into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He puts the alligator up on the bar.
He turns to the astonished patrons. "I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. Then the gator will close his mouth for one minute. He'll then open his mouth and I'll remove my unit unscathed. In return for witnessing this spectacle, each of you will buy me a drink.
"The crowd murmured their approval. The man stood up on the bar, dropped his trousers, and placed his privates in the alligator's open mouth.
The gator closed his mouth as the crowd gasped. After a minute, the man grabbed a beer bottle and rapped the alligator hard on the top of its head.
The gator opened his mouth and the man removed his genitals unscathed as promised.
The crowd cheered and the first of his free drinks was delivered.
The man stood up again and made another offer. "I'll pay anyone 100 dollars who's willing to give it a try."
A hush fell over the crowd. After a while, a hand went up in the back of the bar.
A blonde woman timidly spoke up, "I'll try, but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."

30   
11joke rating: 2.73 (30/11)

10.

So there are three construction workers. One is blonde, one is brunette and one is a red head.
Everyday, they sit on the top of their construction building and eat lunch. For the past 4 months, they have all gotten tuna sandwiches.
One day the red head says, "That's it! Next time I get tuna sandwich, I am jumping off the roof of this building."
Both the blonde and the brunette agree.
The next day, they all get tuna sandwiches and they all jump off the roof.
As their wives mourn at their funerals, one wife looks at the blonde's wife and says, "I cant believe they jumped off the roof just because of the tuna sandwiches we made them. I feel so bad."
The blonde wife looks up and says, "Don't look at me, he packs his own lunch."

17   
7joke rating: 2.43 (17/7)

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