If you like funny work jokes or office jokes, you are on right place. Nice collection jokes about professions as lawyers jokes or doctors jokes. Jokes from work are ordered by rating. Best work jokes are first. You can find here funniest work jokes on the world. Profession jokes for every day!
Patient goes to Doctor, doctor starts looking at him...
- Good, good, good...
- Doctor, what's good?
- Good that I don't have what you have...
A system administrator has 2 problems:
- dumb users
- smart users
A man walks into his office box on a Monday morning. He checks his e-mails and sees one from his neighbor.
it reads, "Do you have any naked photos of your wife?"
Outraged the man replies, "NO I DO NOT!!!!"
Shortly after he receives a second e-mail from his neighbor.
Expecting an apology he opens the e-mail.
It reads, "Want to buy some?"
Big inspection on a build site/yard.
The boss tells the workers : what ever happens just act as usual.
The inspection committee were inspecting when a wall just collapses.
-(Worker looking at his watch) : 10:15, just on time
- Say, Dr. Watson... are you gay?
- Wha... How did you know?!
- I'm just asking.
An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland.
The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, "How odd. Scottish sheep are black."
"No, no, no!" says the physicist. "Only some Scottish sheep are black."
The mathematician rolls his eyes at his companions' muddled thinking and says, "In Scotland, there is at least one field, containing at least one sheep, at least one side of which appears black from here."
A patient comes to a doctor, who asks him:
- Do you smoke?
- Do you drink?
- Do you eat fast food?
- Don't worry, I'll find something anyways...
A divorce court judge said to the husband,"Mr Geraghty,I have reviewed this case very carefully and I've decided to give your wife $800 a week."
"That's very fair,your honour," he replied. "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."
To help someone before they commit a crime means you are their accomplice.
To help someone after they commit a crime means you are their attorney.
An engineer and a physicist are in a hot-air balloon. After a few hours they lose track of where they are and descend to get directions.
They yell to a jogger, "Hey, can you tell us where we're at?"
After a few moments the jogger responds, "You're in a hot-air balloon."
The engineer says, "You must be a mathematician."
The jogger, shocked, responds, "Yeah, how did you know I was a mathematician?"
"Because, it took you far too long to come up with your answer, it was 100% correct, and it was completely useless."
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